“To know what you know, and what you do not know, that is true knowledge.” — Confucius
I didn’t know until recently that Confucius is not pronounced “Confuse us,” even if I think it should be. I had a friend once who always told me, “It’s a poor day that you don’t learn something new,” so now I know. I’d hate to meet the guy and not know how to address him properly, right?
Before anyone writes a letter, yes, I know who he was and that he’s long dead. I’m educated and know a fair amount about history, societal norms, baseball, vintage mid-century modern décor, and grammar. Now, if you want to discuss math, cooking skills, chess, or gardening, I am not your girl.
No one knows everything, even if some people think they do, so perhaps that means we should all be learning from each other. We send our kids to school for 13 years, sometimes longer, so they will know how to read, write, add, think critically, and be reasonable people who contribute positively to their community. School isn’t everything, though; there’s so much that we pick up from our family members, our friends, and sometimes just a random encounter.
When Espresso the whale washed up on my beach around this time last year, I learned that whales can explode. Only after they die, which is fortunate for them. Not so fortunate for those around them, however. I’m not sure how knowing that dead whales can explode could help me in life because how often is a dead whale near me? Last year, it was twice, but that likely won’t happen again. Still, that factoid may come up in a trivia game someday.
It’s incredible sometimes when we realize the knowledge that sticks with us compared to what we don’t remember. I still know what my phone number was when I was five years old, but I couldn’t tell you my children’s phone numbers because, with cell phones, I just push the button next to their picture. As we learn how to manage each new wave of technology, maybe there isn’t enough brain space left over to retain the last batch of new information, which is now out of date. If only there were a way to efficiently manage the space we have in our memory banks like we can on our laptops and hard drives. There’s no reason for some of the useless bits of trivia that are stuck in my head, and I could really use that space for something like knowing how to fold a fitted sheet.
I have children in their twenties, and their learning styles are so very different. At their age, I would go to a library for books and materials if I needed to learn something. Five years ago, everyone said, “There’s an app for that.” Now, we don’t even have to do that. We just say, “Hey, Alexa….” and whatever we need to know pops out of some AI bot.
At 60 years old, I’ve learned a lot, but every day, I find there’s something I don’t know, so I feel like I’m definitely living the “IYKYK” acronym, which I only learned the other day. It means, “If you know, you know,” and it almost always refers to something I’m unaware of and then have to research because I hate not being “in the know.” Is that what it’s about now? Social media acronyms somehow rank people based on a random trend, like whether or not you know the latest Jelly Roll lyrics. Oh, if you don’t know, and I didn’t until recently, Jelly Roll is a rapper, not a dessert.
From now on, I think I might start taking more pride in what I don’t know. Because it’s an opportunity to learn, right? I have a dear friend who seems to know everything about cooking. She understands what spices to use, what goes in a homemade marinade, and how to make fried chicken that doesn’t come in a bucket. I don’t know any of that, but every time I see her, I pick up more info and call it a win. So what if I didn’t know what a chive was two days ago? I do now, and my tacos were delicious with chives on the sour cream; who knew? Lots of people knew, now I’m one of them. Life is good, you know? Ya, I know.
Brenda Kelley Kim has lived in Marblehead for 50 years and is an author, freelance writer, and mother of three. Her column appears weekly.
