Luckily for me, longevity runs in my family. Of course, things like cancer and car accidents have intervened, but I’ve had many relatives live into their 90s.
During one of my first follow-up appointments after my transplant, I bluntly asked how long I can expect to live with two new organs. The answer surprised me: You can live as long as you would have lived without the transplant. Naturally, my lifespan has a lot to do with my lifestyle in terms of my diet and how active I am. Then I heard about the documentary “Secrets of the Blue Zones.” It seems there are five areas in the world where many residents are known to live to 100 and beyond. They have much in common in terms of how they eat (they stop when they’re 80% full – something we could learn a lot from) and they’re all very active. They’re also part of a thriving community and can count on their friends, family, and neighbors for care and support.
This is all great, and it’s important that we take care of our bodies (after all, we only get one so we should treat it appropriately). But to me, it’s just as important that we maintain a good outlook on life. I wouldn’t want to live to 100 if I were miserable and alone because what’s the point? That would be prolonging the misery. Life must be worth living.
I just read a fascinating article in my trusty “AARP: The Magazine” (I stubbornly resisted joining AARP for a few years because I was in denial about getting older; they contact you when you’re 50 for heaven’s sake!). The author wrote about his grandmothers, who both lived to 104. Grandma Ruth was physically active, socially involved, loving, and happily married. She personified what we all aspire to when we’re old.
Grandma Charlotte was a Holocaust survivor, an introvert who quietly bore the injustices and cruelty she suffered and poured her love into her husband and children. She didn’t go out much, but she had a spine made of steel (you’d pretty much have to, if you survived the Holocaust). To quote the author, though: “She endured life more than she reveled in it.” *
But Grandma Charlotte was certainly loved by her family, so although she was an introvert who loved being in her home, people came to her, and she didn’t claim to be lonely. Grandma Ruth, on the other hand, traveled right up until the end, went to aerobics classes and had numerous hobbies.
According to their grandson, their extreme longevity can be explained with three theories: Resilience, Love, and Faith. I’m not sure any one of them is more important than the other, although if I had to pick, I’d put my money on resilience. You know the phrase “what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger?” I’m a big fan. And fun fact – it’s thought to be attributed to Friedrich Nietzsche.
Having gone through the death of my husband and a life-changing illness and recovery, I feel like I could face anything. And I often think that people are a lot stronger than they give themselves credit for. Two of my closest friends have gone through some harrowing life events and faced their own challenges with strength and grace. No wonder I want to be around them; they’re inspiring and they simply radiate positivity. I hope to be remembered someday in that way.
I’m also extremely lucky to have a loving family and many close friends. I learned a long time ago how to spot toxic people, and I surround myself with good ones. I have a lot of love in my life, and I draw great strength from it.
As far as faith goes, I was raised Catholic, but I don’t belong to a church or care to worship in a formal way. However, I strongly believe in karma, and what you put out in the world, you will receive in return. I try very hard to put out good, positive, and affirming energy. I’m a happy person, and I want to make others happy as well. My recent aha! moment is that when I come across someone who’s rude or offensive, that person must be terribly unhappy, and I won’t add to it with my own negative energy in return. There’s nothing to be gained from that. (But if they cut me off in traffic, I’m not going to smile and wave…)
If it’s in your genes to live to 100, that’s wonderful. Make it a life worth living; we all have it in us to do that. And pssst: the Marblehead Council on Aging is a great place to start! (Shameless promotion.)
*AARP: The Magazine (August/September, 2025)
