“Frugality is getting more for less. Cheap is getting less for less.” — J.P. Lynn
I wouldn’t say I’m cheap, but I can squeeze a quarter so hard, Washington screams. It’s a simple matter of supply and demand — my supply of money is not unlimited, and the demands of my food budget and bank usually drown out my demands for a new pair of pumps.
Not being able to buy whatever I want, whenever I want, is not a hardship. I understand that I lead a pretty privileged life, and I’m grateful for it, but budgeting has always been challenging for me. I’m like that pirate ship ride you see at carnivals. One week, I could swing way over to the penny-pinching, mercurial side, complaining about how much everything costs, and the next week, I’m treating myself to a plate of clams at the Barnacle.
At one particular lunch at the Barnacle — it was a grilled cheese week, not a plate of clams week — the topic of finances came up with my lunch buddy, and she said, “There’s a difference between the price of something and its value.”
She’s right — quality matters. You don’t cheap out when your kid needs shoes for a dance class or a mouthguard for sports. That’s when you go for the best because what’s more valuable, your bank balance or your kid’s face?
When I had kids in sports, there was a lot of boxed mac and cheese and store-brand cereal at my house, but they had good cleats and the highest-rated bike helmets they make. It’s a balance thing. So what if I’m carrying a cheap purse from Target and the cell phone inside isn’t the latest model with all the bells and whistles? I’d much rather spend the money on safe equipment.
As the kids get older, though, it changes. Did my daughter have to have that pair of high-end Ugg slippers from Nordstrom? Not really, but it was Christmas, and she’s a good kid. Did I need the Michael Kors purse that replaced the cheap one from Target? No, but I’d landed a new job, I was commuting and carrying a laptop and other gear, and I decided to treat myself to something special.
It’s not easy to sort out how much money to spend on something. Value is definitely different than price. A price is just a number on a tag. Value is much more complicated because a high price doesn’t always mean high quality, as I found with my designer bag when the strap broke after six months of everyday use. Does a cheap price always mean shoddy quality? Also no, because that Target bag was still in my closet and still in one piece.
Decisions around money can be a minefield because they’re very personal. We bring a lot of baggage to financial issues. I know people who won’t shop in thrift stores because they can’t stand the thought of buying something used. I live for yard sales, thrift stores, and church rummage sales. I literally squealed at the Goodwill store when I spotted a pair of Frye boots for $25. I don’t care who had their toes in them first, they’re mine now.
There is no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to spending. I will always shell out for quality, especially when it’s an item that has to hold up in the long term. Still, hunting up a bargain or throwing a birthday party on a dollar-store budget is a necessary skill to have.
I’m nowhere near ready to retire, but I know that the financial decisions will shift again once I do. Denying ourselves an occasional treat is no more sustainable than spending like a sailor on shore leave. Much like the amusement-park pirate ship swinging back and forth, finances and spending decisions can be a wild ride — scary but fun. Let go and enjoy what you can, and hold on for the rougher parts.
Brenda Kelley Kim has lived in Marblehead for 50 years, and is an author, freelance writer, and mother of three. Her column appears weekly.