“Don’t look backwards, you’re not going that way. Also, you’ll fall on your butt.” —Francis L. Kelley.
My father always said this to me, and he was right. Mostly because even when I am moving forward, the odds of falling down are pretty good. I struggle with balance metaphorically and literally, but people say it’s not about how many times you hit the deck; it’s about getting back up. I must believe that; otherwise, I’d just sit around with bloody knees, too afraid to go anywhere.
So, here I am, up off the dirt after a few difficult months figuring out which way to go. For me, being a writer is not just my job; it’s a dream fulfilled and the biggest part of who I have always wanted to be. It’s better than a lottery win that this is what I get to do.
In this column, there will be opinions, some of them mine, some of them from others. There will be discussion, lively debate, and a whole lot of words. I’m Irish; why use 10 words when 500 will do? Words matter; we should choose wisely when deciding which ones to put out there. They convey a message that can go beyond the dictionary meaning, and like that pair of stilettos I bought on clearance and probably should not attempt to wear while standing or walking, they can’t be taken back.
Regrets about the words we use happen constantly, and almost nothing is worse than knowing something you probably should not have said landed hard. Even worse than that is the harsh realization that there were words we should have said but did not.
Topics will be all over the map, and that is just how I like it. Family, friendship, fashion, politics, local lore, trivial matters, important issues, and possibly a few rants will all show up here. Hopefully, others will enjoy these random wanderings as well. Another observation my father made was, “You’re often wrong, but at least you are never uncertain.” That didn’t always work out well for me, however. Are we ever really sure of anything? No, but indecision is a killer; if you have a goal, you have to have a way to get there, and then you have to get up and start moving.
Still, we’ve all changed course at some point, right? Dithering around like a gnat on Red Bull is a bad idea, but sticking to an idea or a plan that doesn’t work isn’t much better. There will be some uncertainty here, at least on my end, but I will try to use it to at least figure out which options won’t accomplish anything but more doubt.
Knowing which way to go will always be challenging, even with eyes front and a goal in sight. Some days all you can do is keep from losing ground. I am not a runner, but I’ve done a few 5K road races, usually for a good cause. Mostly I walked, except for the last few yards when I wanted to run it up and make it look good. When you enter a 5K, if you aren’t the winner, you usually get a medal that says, “Finisher.” I’m not a fan of participation trophies; in racing, someone has to come in first, but there are no blue ribbons on my wall. Still, the acknowledgment that you finished something you started? I’m calling that a win.
While my name will be at the top of this space, that doesn’t mean it’s all about me. What it will be about remains to be seen, but if nothing else, I hope readers will think about what is said here and let me know what they take from it. Communication isn’t one voice; it’s a conversation that should include ideas, thoughts, and suggestions from all corners. I’m so happy to be here. Thanks for reading, and shoot me an email at brenda@marbleheadweeklynews.com if you have something to say. I promise I will listen.
Brenda Kelley Kim has lived in Marblehead for 50 years, and is an author, freelance writer, and mother of three. Her column will appear weekly.