“Food is not rational. Food is culture, habit, craving, and identity.” — Jonathan Sofran Foer
I was glad to read this quote this week because my eating habits have never been rational. I was super picky as a kid, a disaster in the kitchen, and I have the palette of a five-year-old. Nuggs and mac and cheese are my go-to food groups.
I was talking about food and recipes with a good friend who is a phenomenal cook. She knows how to “layer flavors” and can chop real garlic cloves, instead of using the kind in a jar. She teases me about the shortcuts I use, like Shake and Bake and peas from a can, but we both discovered that we have some pretty irrational food tastes.
My friend could cook you an authentic gourmet meal, but she doesn’t drink coffee, and she doesn’t eat fast food. If I had to give up drive-thru fries and my Dunks regular, I might lose the will to get up in the morning.
I don’t eat eggs, which has now grown to the level of refusing to eat anything yellow. Having been a diner waitress, I’ve had to carry plates of sunny-side-up eggs, oozing yolk onto the bacon, and a Big Man’s breakfast that came with the request, “scrambled loose, bacon soft.” The eggs should have come with a straw, and the bacon was so close to raw that I think I could still hear the pig squealing.
I also won’t touch tuna of any kind. It’s surprising because I will eat raw shellfish, like oysters, clams, and shrimp, but tuna will send me over the edge. If a can of tuna is opened around me, I will nearly gag from the smell and the look of it. Fish meat in a can? Isn’t that what we call cat food?
When I asked a few people I know about their food aversions, it was nice to see I’m not just some weirdo with a food disorder. Everyone has their own food habits and particular tastes. Someone told me they won’t eat any kind of potatoes. Not going to lie, I can’t imagine that. The potato, at least for me, is nature’s perfect food. So versatile, so delicious. From home fries to mashed, how do you not eat potatoes and still stay alive? But this person couldn’t believe I wouldn’t eat an egg. We all have food issues at some point.
I often wonder how these habits develop. Growing up, I was the pickiest child on the planet. My mother accommodated it, cooking one meal for the rest of the family and letting me eat cereal or a PB&J. I didn’t do that with my kids. There was one dinner, and there was always something on the table that my kids would eat, even just bread and butter. Buttered toast, a spoonful of canned corn, and three baby carrots can make up a meal, and fed is fed.
Texture is key in some food dislikes. Some people love beans, eggplants, and other mushy foods; others I know won’t touch a bean, or applesauce, or anything “blended.” Color also seems to be a an issue for some people. I don’t like yellow food, someone I know won’t eat anything orange, and a friend said she knows people who won’t eat anything green. At a party I hosted once, I made a “moon cheese ball,” which was herbed cream cheese, covered with pumpkin seeds.
You know what most party guests won’t eat? A lumpy, grey cheese ball. People walked by it, both fascinated and repelled. I stuck a small American flag toothpick in it and claimed it for the United States, and it shall remain a distant memory.
Talking to some others about food issues made me feel less like a lunatic with imaginary problems. I still reach for one of my plastic cafeteria-type trays when I make roast beef. Meat juice cannot touch my veggies or my starch, or all hell will break loose. I never argue with other people’s food preferences because mine are just as goofy.
Since we all have some kind of food aversion, making fun of others for their likes and dislikes is really not OK. My brother got on me once about turning up my nose at so many foods, and I said, “We didn’t have onions in the stuffing for 15 years because of you. Or did we? Maybe they were in there all the time, and we just didn’t tell you.”
Food preferences will always be there. They don’t make a person ungrateful or uncooperative. Not everyone is a fan of every food, so don’t hassle someone when they ask for the dressing “on the side.” It’s their plate, let them enjoy it.
